Executive Presence: Three Ways to Build Confidence

“Just be confident!” is often said to someone struggling with self limiting beliefs, doubts about their competence, or overall presence.

Confidence is defined as “a feeling of self-assurance arising from one's appreciation of one's own abilities or qualities.” So if you’re confident, you are self assured. You appreciate your own abilities. You know your qualifications. It’s safe to say that without this feeling, you will struggle with exuding executive presence.

As a reminder, executive presence as defined by The Elan Principle is “the quality of exuding confidence, care, and authenticity within a position of influence that inspires and empowers others to action.”

Confidence can be sensed through appearance, speech, and mannerisms. It’s gauged in a presentation and email. When someone doesn’t have it, especially when that person is in a position of leadership or influence, it can make it difficult for their team to trust them.

I’m not always confident. I remember sharing this with someone who responded with “but you play it off so well!” And here’s the thing- I do it well because I’ve been doing it for years. Some of our clients who struggle with it deeply are shown how to build up their confidence through a method we haven’t shared publicly before.

If you struggle with confidence and you’ve lost out on jobs, promotions, and opportunities because of it, here’s a little known secret that may change your life: confidence is a habit.

Using principles of habit formation can help your brain tell you that you are a confident person. Here are my three favorite habits.

Exercise. It’s no secret that exercise reduces stress, aids in mental health challenges, and releases endorphins. It also helps you challenge yourself. Whenever you finish a challenging workout, your brain sends you a signal of achievement. You’re not competing with anyone else but yourself. Also, exercises like barre and pilates help strengthen your posture, which is scientifically proven to not only improve how others see us but how our hormones make us less reactive to stress.

“YES GIRL” list. Keep a running list, either digital or physical, of your wins. We’re talking about the small wins like having a good hair day to the big wins of securing a big promotion. Too often, we overlook our wins as things we are “supposed to be doing” so we don’t bother to congratulate ourselves and we don’t document them, especially at work. If you struggle with confidence and focus on negative self talk, this can be detrimental to your well-being and overall sense of self. If you don’t already have a running list of workplace accomplishments, start one right now.

Say “I don’t know”. A common misconception is that confident people are never or rarely wrong. This is not true. When you are confident, you are self-assured and are aware about what you do and do not know. Make it a habit to admit when you’re not fully informed about something and then go find the answer. This not only communicates to those around you that you are someone eager to learn but that you can also be trusted to be open about where you need growth. The trust factor is hugely important in building executive presence. Try using a statement like “I’m not sure about that but if you give me a moment, I can go find out.”

These are just a few of the methods that we work with clients on when coaching them on building confidence through executive presence.

In our next post, I’ll share another aspect of executive presence that makes all the difference in inspiring trust.